Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Let's talk about body mod, defining ourselves, finding tribes, and judgemental folk.

Before we start, let's read this:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/lindsay-mannering/tattoos-the-need-to-stand_b_115521.html

I'll wait.

Read the comments, too.




Ok. Done? Meeeeeee toooo. I am SO done. Wow. That was an amazing pit of hate, no? That's ok, that's what huffpo DOES is hatehatehate and be snotty upper middleclass east coast folk.
So. Tattoos.
A need to stand out?
Sure, for some.
Just like grandma with her bleach job and hip huggers and surfer girl (and i mean GIRL) sweatshirt.
Just like the dude over there with the horrible combover.
Just like the asshole in the jacked up pickup covered in redneck/"calvin" peeing/confededrate flag stickers.
yes. We all like to DEFINE ourselves by calling attention to our interests, our tribes, if you will.
Do we do it purely for the sake of making people LOOK at us? Maybe, but usually with the intent of seeing if we can identify kindreds or opposition. It's how we know where we stand.
It's why some women deck out in full make up and high heels to go by groceries, and others schlep in wearing sweats and hangover hair and even others still just wear jeans and sandals and no makeup. Don't forget hairy pits in the summer. That's attention grabbing. Just like that guy over there in the day glo short shorts and mesh tank top. Or the dude with the mohawk. Or the guy in the ferrari.
Now.
Don't get me wrong. I understand tattoos are permanent identifiers.
Just like plastic surgery.
Or laser hair removal.
Or scars (which are a badge of pride in many circles...is that just an american thing...?).
Or high heel use - permanant foot deformities, there.
Huh. Do I judge anyone and claim to know as some of the HuffPo commentors do that 'women look trashy in high heels' or that 'people who drive that car/wear those clothes/color their hair that way are idiots and therefore beneath my notice or respect'...????

ABSOFUCKINGLUTELY NOT.

Well, why not, you ask?
Because. I am an adult, and I don't give a fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck what you look like, how you dress (or don't....nudists are ok too), or what car you drive. Most people have shitty taste, and that ain't their fault, they were just raised too far away from art and nature or were taught to believe that the more you spend the hotter/better it looks. I'd much rather judge you by the tv shows you watch, the books you DON'T read (coz most don't read AT ALL), the choices in life you've made (cult member, oooo, bad call, BioDad), and how you treat me and mine.
Other than that, it's none of my damned business, and I have my own life. I don't need to worry about you and your silly tasmanian devil tattoo. It ain't my taste, but it ain't my skin. I don't care.
Manwife is in posession of a tattoo I personally find a silly silly thing...dragon, skull, etc. Oh my. BUT. It isn't my skin. I will not be wearing it to the grave, and it is not mine to attach meaning to. No. So I am cool with it, not that it matters one iota. Again, it is not my skin or life or choice. As far as bad choices go, I'd prefer someone with a bad tat over someone with a felony assault rap. Fo sho, my friends.
I should disclose and mention the only ones in my fam (ma, pa, bro, sis in law, cousins, husband, self, uncles, even some aunts) who do not posess tats are all under 18. Even my dorky uncle has one. Some of us maybe got them to fit in, some got them to be rebelious, or badass, or to commemorate sobriety, or to mark milestones. Mostly we like the way they look, just like that lady with the bad frost-dye job likes her hair, or the dude in the jacked up toyota likes the way his truck looks.
I personally got the tats because in my fam, they are a marking of the tribe - we are the black sheep tribe, the amassing of hippies and freaks and grease monkeys and brainiac rednecks from about four or five different places. My parents have tats. My husband. My cousins. My bro. And we are middle class, some of the extended folks are even what you'd call "upper middle class WASPS" except they are not anglo saxon OR protestants, despite our DAR memberships.
So it isn't an issue of class. It's a method of communicating to your people, the style and content further identify one thus. Do i get down with the crew sporting rockabilly icons? Not really. More the kids with the psychedellic buddhas and picasso pictures and ancestral art and japanese fresco-y thingies.

So, basically, if you don't like them, cool. There are things people don't like about your social/cultural identifiers, too. That's why we don't all wear the same grey shirts and pants, we want to find our matches out there in the crowds and express who we think we are and what we feel a part of or where we want to or do belong. It's not a signifier of personality, or content of character, or intellect, just like the lady with the bad knock off fendi is maybe a sucessful doctor who doesn't like to pay designer prices, OR a poor student lady with fashionista tastes. who the fuck knows, and who the fuck are you or I or anyone to judge that? C'mon now. Grow up, y'all.

3 comments:

INNER VOICES said...

dang... i didnt read the article... sounds like you rightfully hammered them about it though....


some of my tattoos were the "right of passage" types. others were to cover them up. others were just for me and some i cant even see! huh?


anyway great post!!!

Moominmama said...

The HuffPo article wouldn't load, but I can imagine what it said. They are fairly predictable over there.

I think you are dead on about the whole tribal identifiers thing. Me? I wear spandex, thank you.

Secret Agent Squid said...

Z - I actually refrained from commenting! I try not to get involved in the comments there, they are terrible and hurt my heart.
My tats are the same way, maybe I am too much a libertarian to understand why it matters so much to people to slam them.

CB - I keep telling myself I will never, ever go back, but I do like the format. i have poor impulse control about NOT reading the comments there though.
And I don't wear spandex, only because it is not friendly to ladies with chubby hips and tiny potbellies. ouch! i do wear clogs, though, What not to Wear be damned!